Saturday, October 28, 2006

I fell

Well, funny thing is I did a handfull of reasonably difficult trails this year on my Hardtail and Came out of all of it without a scratch. I even had a group of guys on a trail suggest that pads and a fullsuspension would not be a bad Idea for the stuff I was riding. I haven't fallen all season.....well until friday night. I don't get emabarrased very easily, but if my friends would have seen this wipeout. I would never have been able to live it down. Too bad knowone was there. Haha.

I was on my old norco road bike (a bike capable of gnarly speeds) and comming home from a small shindig with the Ridley's family. I made it all the way to my own street which some of you may have noticed is a slight downhill. I love this part of my ride. It's like the cherry on the top when you finally get to the top of the heritage hill. You can really get cooking on my hill, right before you hop the curb and ride up the lawn to my house. Needlees to say I bailed. I got up the curb and got partly off my bike for some reason. In the postion you use when people tell you to get off the bike and walk, but you don't want to. Standing on one pedal with your whole body on one side of the bike coasting. As soon as I went from the pavement to the lawn I knew I was gonna eat dirt. Road bike tires tend not to bite so well on cold dewy grass. Before I knew it I was laying in the grass trying to asses damage and stop laughing at the same time. Wish someone could have been there, they would have enjoyed it.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

About My Blog

I taking my introspective thoughts to the internet. Right now I feel like a lost soul. I just broke up with Chelsey after dating for 4 years. It's over. We are not on bad terms. We plan on staying friends, although it very trying on my emotions. I'm not mad at her and she's not mad at me.

I started this blog a long time ago but never wrote a single post. It's not that I had nothing to say before. I just had nothing interesting to say. Im sure there will be posts that nobody but me will get anything valuable from. The need to share what I am feeling with everyone I know has become hard to contain. I hate being the sad, lonley and always a little bit depressed guy around a group of happy people. I don't like how it brings others down and If you see me you have to know I am trying hard to stay upbeat right now. I am even trying to avoid talking to you about it because I know it gets old when someone whines and complains everytime you talk to them. Problem is a much as I want to feel good about shit I can't escape the pain. Right now ALL I want to do is talk about it.

With that said most of my posts for awile will probably be me babbling introspectively about my problems. Eventually as I get over shit my posts will mostly talk about video games, bikes, technology and most importantly my experiences with my friends.

Feelings

Well shit. Feelings are a bitch. Dirty unescapable little parisites in your mind. At least the negative shit anyway. Possibly the unfortunate side effect of evolution. Sometimes I wish I had an off switch. It's not that I'd just flip it and everything would be alright. I would just be able to accomplish something then flip the emotions back on after. Sometimes I feel completley imobilized by thoughts. Like I am too busy thinking to direct my attention to a medial task. I am too busy feeling pain. WTF? It's stupid when you are able to look at the situation without the pain. Being very hung over doesn't help much either. Today I accomplished nothing. I'd have to say that the mixture of a hang over and just generally feeling sorry for myself really sucks.

That and LAG on one of my favortie distractions. Gaming. Go figure, I get years of lag free gaming when gaming caused me more problems than good. Then when I really need the soothing distraction of blowing stuff up in virtual worlds my internet connection craps out. Not completely, but just enough to ruin the soothing part of the whole experience.

Back to feelings. Not everything associated with my breakup has been bad. I identified with the movie 'The Break-up' like no movie before in the history of movies. That was funny, just me alone currled up on the couch with the parasite feelings watching a movie about a break up. My movie review goes like this. Vince Vaughn is the man. Nuff said. I think that this movie is his own brainchild and he must have been through a few break ups himself. It's like the whole movie was being pulled straight from my own experience. Funny, if I had watched this movie before I broke up with Chelsey I might have just said it's a good movie. Now I am more inclined to say that this is a Great Movie. Apperently a movie is only as good as how you can Identify with the characters. You learn something new everyday.